Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Decisions and undecisivness...

I never cease to be amazed by people and change.
I have never had so many mixed emotions in my life.
A seemingly constant battle between my head and my heart,
what is right and wrong,
and what will make me happy.
I don't really believe in mistakes.
I think everything that happens is a conscious decision,
you made it for a reason.
The reason may not always be clear and the outcome may not necessarily lead to happiness,
but with every decision comes a lesson to learn.
Sometimes, you can be like me and never seem to learn the lessons life is trying to teach you.
Everything happens for a reason though, right?
Is caring about someone a mistake?
Is letting go of something great a mistake?
Do mistakes just become regrets when such strong emotions are inolved?
I don't regret letting go of things.
It allows for growth and time.
I believe in letting go when you know it's the right thing to do.
You can love someone with all your heart, but know it can't work.
Luckily, life is a fickle thing.
Sometimes, it throws opporunity your way when you least expect it.
Whether you want to take that opportunity, well, that is all up to you.
Life doesnt always have the best timing either,
and it doesnt always take into account how you have changed.
People, now people are fickle.
myself included.
I feel one way, then talk as if I feel another.
Then, I wonder why someone else doesnt feel the way I do.
Oh wait, that's right,
because they dont truthfully know what I am thinking.
Its a good mechanism to avoid the unpleasant.
To avoid heartbreak.
To avoid hurt.
To avoid a mistake.
Or maybe, to avoid something to regret.
-K